I’m 20. I grew up in France with my mom and my sisters. My family and my friends always accepted me as a bisexual woman even if few of them don’t really understand what it means. But when I was younger (around 12 years old) and that I realised I might like girls too, I was completely lost. And I surely didn’t want to talk about it with anybody.
I looked up for movies with queer relationships in it. But there wasn’t a lot of LGBT representation. And I couldn’t find answers to my questions. So I tried to forget about it and pretend that I was completely straight for few years.
When I started to watch the100, Clarke Griffin was already my favorite. It was maybe the first time that I could identify myself that much in a character. But I had no idea at that time that I would discover the best character ever, Lexa AND that this amazing woman would have had a love relationship with one of my favorite character on TV. The relationship between Clarke and Lexa changed my life. I’ve never been that passionate about something. Between season 2 and 3, I spent ALL my free time reading about the100 and about Clexa. This was my escape. This was my hopes. This was my dreams.
I discovered a really big community of fans. Amazing people. That’s also where I found my current girlfriend who is a Clexa lover too. All of this gave me confidence and strengths. Thanks to it, I had the courage to come out to my family and my friends but more importantly, to accept who I am. When Lexa died, my heart broke in thousands of pieces. It was the end of hope for me. I never cried for so long. It was like dealing with a break up. But a terrible break up. A giant betrayal. That weakened me a lot.
Today, I’m still hurt but this wound is now a strength. I use it to remember myself that I should always fight for what is right. Lexa and Clarke still are inspiring me. And they’ll always do.